You Don't Know A Thing
by Blossoming Nightshade
Summary: Harry goes through a lot of bad stuff in his life, leave it to Snape to uncover his dark secrets. Will be Snarry in later chapters, warnings inside, and yes, it will earn it's rating in later chapters. yay!
1. But They Can Never Kill My Love For You

Hey Everyone! This crazy idea popped into my head, *cowers* please don't hit me. Its a story about all the horrible stuff Harry goes through in Goblet of fire, but I threw in some differences, as you will notice. First of all, Barty Crouch Jr. is a good guy, Harry knows that Severus is a spy, Harry's relatives are abusive (though there is only one mention and will be no discription of that), Snape and Harry are on _slightly _friendlier terms, and thats is all i can think of for now. My brain is fried.

Please note that before getting to the delicious Snarry part *drools. mmm snarry, wipes off mouth* anyway, before you get to the snarry part, you will have to wade through mention of Barty crouch Jr./Harry. But there are no graphic scenes, only the slightest slightest hints of a more physical relationship. But I think it is kinda sweet. So yea. Don Like-Dont Read y'all. And No flames please. this is only going to be a few chapter story, until I find more time to work on my other Snarry "Confessions of A Different Sort" So yea, there ya go.

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Harry had just made his way from the graveyard of Voldemort's parents, back to the grounds. He collapsed on the ground crying, clutching the body of his dead friend. Mad-Eye came to drag him off to a room in the castle.

They arrived in Mad-Eye's office, the trunk in the corner. The large hand let go of the strong hold on Harry's arm, as the boy spun around and buried his face into the older man's body.

"Barty, what am I going to do?" The older man clutched the weeping boy to his chest.

"We can get through this, Harry. But let me take the reversal for my Polyjuice, so that I can hold you in my arms." Harry nodded, thinking of how much better it would feel to look into the face of his lover. Barty Crouch Jr. grabbed the purple vial from a drawer in his desk and swallowed it in one gulp. His skin shifted and transformed into the wild-haired, thin, tall man that Harry had come to love. Barty Crouch Jr. walked over to Harry and held him tightly to his chest, long arms engulfing the crying boy. The older man held the boys head securely under his chin, lovingly running his fingers through the wild black hair.

"We can get through this Harry, just like we got through everything else. We got you through the dragon, and the Merpeople, we can get through this. I know he was your friend, but we'll get through this. Alright?"

"Everyone in the castle is going to hate me, just like they did when my name was pulled from the goblet."

"Not everyone hated you Harry." Barty whispered

"Don't try to sugar coat it Barty, even my best friends hated me. They wouldn't even look at me."

"Not everyone hated you Harry. I didn't. I watched you from the shadows, around every corner, falling more and more in love with you as I saw you for who you really were."

"I know, love." Harry whispered

"So, even if every other stupid bugger in this castle hates you, you still have me." Barty said as he lifted Harry's head up with his fingers.

"So, cheer up and dry those tears. I didn't defy the Dark Lord, learn to lie under the effect of Veritaserum, or spend all those nights training you, so that you could cry into my shoulder." Both men smiled and Harry pressed a gentle kiss onto the older man's lips. "Come on you, I brought you a special present."

"What?"

"A nice cold pack of Butter Beer, just for the two of us. There's also a candle light dinner with your favorite pasta and some Treacle Tart, but I knew you'd like the Butter Beer the most." A gentle smile formed on Barty's face as Harry gently laughed. "Now sit down in the chair and I will bring you dinner."

"Barty, Love, Maybe we can skip dinner?"

"Jump right to the alcohol? That my Harry!" Barty said laughing as he ruffled the younger man's hair.

"Actually I was thinking of something a little more intimate." Harry said looking into his lovers face as Barty kneeled in front of his young lover.

"Harry, you just watched your friend get murdered in cold blood by my former master. I don't think now is the time for such activities."

"It's not like we haven't done it before." Harry pointed out

"I don't want to take advantage of you, Harry." Barty said placing a gentle hand on Harry's knee

"Please, Barty." Harry's voice began to crack. "I need to feel your arms around me, reminding me that there is still love in this horrid world." Barty Crouch Jr. sighed.

"I never could deny you anything." He said before placing his hands on the arms of the chair and capturing Harry's lips in a passionate kiss. After several moments, the older man bit Harry's bottom lip. The younger man moaned and opened his lips, granting the older man entrance as he plundered his mouth, tongues intertwining. They both looked towards the door as they heard footsteps pounding through the classroom.

The door to the office burst open with a blast as Albus Dumbledore, Minerva McGonagall, and Severus Snape made their way through the door and surrounded the entrance. Minerva rushed to Harry and pulled him up from the chair, crossing the room and shielding him with her body. Dumbledore approached Barty Crouch Jr. and shoved him down in the chair. Snape opened the man's mouth and poured Veritaserum in, waiting only a few moments before it would have taken affect.

"Who am I" Dumbledore demanded

"Albus Dumbledore, Headmaster of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry."

"Who are you?"

"Barty Crouch Jr." Harry tried to break free of his Head of House's strong grip, but to no avail.

"Who do you work for?" Dumbledore demanded.

Harry struggled against the woman's strong grip again, then stilled as he remembered something that his lover had said only days before.

"_Harry, there may become a time when I have to plead allegiance to the Dark Lord, to save you."_

"_NO! You will be given the Dementor's kiss for sure." Barty Crouch Jr. sighed, he knew Harry would act badly to his decision, but it had to be done._

"_Harry, you are the best thing that has ever happened to me. Please, let me protect you to the very end. I have been training under the influence of Veritaserum."_

"_You mean that you can lie under it's influences?"_

"_Yes."_

"_But, we can go to Dumbledore, we can tell him how much you have helped The Order of the Phoenix, he can grant you a pardon, like he did for Snape!"_

"_Harry, it was a different world when that occurred. The Dark Lord was believed to be dead back then, there was hope in the Wizarding world. There is no hope anymore, besides, Snape agreed to be the Headmaster's pet in return. I am simply spying, without a master. No one would believe me. I have no proof."_

"_I can be the proof, you can use my memories."_

"_Harry, that would discredit you to a degree that would be irreparable. Everything you have worked for would be in vain. Please Harry; there will be a time when this is necessary. I will only use this when it is absolutely crucial. Please believe me when I say that I don't want to do this any more than you want me to do this. I don't want to be separated from you, but I will if it means that you will live. If the world knows that their Golden boy and a Death Eater are in a relationship, then they can throw you in Azkaban for aiding me. Please, trust me."_

"_I don't like this." Harry said resigned_

"_I don't either, love." Barty said holding Harry closer in his arms, kissing his neck._

"_Fine" Harry sighed "How will I know?"_

"_I'll remind you." Barry said as he kissed Harry gently on the lips._

"Who do you work for?!" Dumbledore yelled, demanding an answer

"I work for…The Dark Lord"

"NO!" Harry screamed out "NO!" he yelled trying to get out of the older woman iron grasp again.

"Remember! I work for The Dark Lord." Barty crouch said trying to look as if the potion was working.

"No, please." Harry whispered, wide eyes focusing on the young man in the chair.

"It's alright, Potter, you're safe." McGonagall said believing that Harry was fearful, and he was, but not for himself.

"Minerva, Severus. We will escort Barty Crouch Jr. to my office, where I will contact the Minister. Rest assured this monster will receive the Kiss within the hour." McGonagall and Dumbledore flanked Barty Crouch Jr. and lifted him from the chair, pulling him towards the door, pausing as they looked at Harry, leaning on the desk. "Harry, come, the Minister will want to hear what has happened." Harry looked up at everyone with distant eyes, threatening to overflow with infinite tears.

"I need some time alone, professors. I just…I can't go." Harry said as a stray tear fell from his eyes. McGonagall whispered towards the Headmaster.

"Perhaps, Potter has been through enough for one night, Albus."

"Very well. Severus, you will stay with the boy and make sure that he remains safe."

"Of course, Headmaster." Severus said nodding

"Come Minerva, we have no time to lose." Dumbledore said as Harry cast one last look at his beloved. Severus closed the door behind them, locking it and warding it against intruders. Harry squeezed his eyes shut, silent tears leaking through, as he sank to his knees on the cold stone floor.

Severus walked closer, noticing the fists clenched so tight at the boy's sides that his knuckles were white; he noticed how his messy black hair hung down over his eyes, head falling foreword in ultimate sorrow. "Potter." Severus said quietly as he rested a hand on the young man's shoulder. "Harry, I am aware that I am not usually the one for optimism, but you can get through this. Everything will be fine"

Harry choked out a sob, as he hands unfurled, fingers clawing at the floor. Trying, grasping to find a warmth and comfort that would never be found in that cold, rough, stone floor. "Why?" Harry thought aloud as he stood up and walked towards the door. "Why is everything, everyone I love, always taken away?"

Snape walked towards the boy. 'What is he doing, there is a Death Eater in the school, and he is trying to escape the only safe room in the castle? What is he mumbling about?' "Potter. You will stay here."

"I'm simply returning to my dormitory for the night, Snape." Harry said before turning around to look at the man plastering an obviously fake smile on his tear stained face. Though whether he was trying to convince Snape or himself, the professor wasn't sure. "Like you said, everything will be just fine." And with that Harry walked out of the room from a shocked Snape, and slammed the door.


	2. If It Could Just Be You and Me

3 Months Later-

Harry walked through the halls, back at school again. He wondered how the other students could run around and laugh. Even though the summer had passed, the death of his friend was still fresh on his mind, though not as fresh or as painful as the scars of his lost beloved.

Classes went as usual, with Hermione dragging him and Ron ten minutes early to every one. The teachers began noticing the withdrawn state of Harry, but believed that he simply need some time with his friends before he would be back to normal. But as the days passed they noticed that the situation did not get any better.

Flitwick, Hagrid, Dumbledore and even McGonagall tried speaking to him after classes. They all wound up with the same response. "I appreciate your concern, but everything is fine." Ron and Hermione even got the same response when they tried to talk to him.

One afternoon, after Potions, Snape held Harry back after class. Harry approached the desk and looked expectantly at the dour man.

"Sit." Harry did as he was told, knowing that Snape hated saying anything more than once.

"Look, Professor, if you are trying to discuss the same thing every other professor has with me, then I assure you that it is unneeded and that-"

"Everything is fine. Yes, so I've been told. However, Mr. Potter. I do not believe that everything is _fine_. Your class performance and grades are slipping, you appear as if you have not slept in months, and you hardly eat at meals. As hesitant as other professors have been to point such things out to you, I assure you, I do not share the same hesitation. And I will not allow you to leave my quarters until I find out what is wrong."

"Professor, before the summer, I experienced hatred from the entire school, and the visiting schools, for my involvement in the TriWizard Tournament. I battled the most dangerous type of Dragon alive, fought with Merpeople, and was not only brought before a horde of Death Eaters, but assisted in the revival of Voldemort. After which, I had to watch Cedrick Diggory, my friend, get murdered in cold blood. Hopefully, you are not brainless enough to believe that I would be my happy and chipper self as soon as school started, or ever again for that matter. So, as I have repeated time and time again, thank you for your concern, but I am handling things and everything will be fine." Harry said as he stood and turned his back to the Potions master walking towards the door, which locked with a flick of a wand, before Harry could open it.

"Sit down, Potter." Harry looked back.

"Actually I'm quite content. Now if you will please excuse me."

"Mr. Potter, I don't care if I have to use the Imperious to get you to sit and Veritaserum to make you tell the truth. You are not leaving here until I find out what is going on. Now SIT!" Snape growled. Harry realized defeat, Snape had never been angry enough with him to threaten the Unforgivables, and he wouldn't test his chances.

"Now, despite everything you have said, I believe that there is something else that is bothering you. Now, could you tell me, or at least give me an idea as to what that would be?" Severus looked down at Harry, who, as expected, looked rather uncomfortable. "I assure you that anything personal will be kept in the strictest confidence." Severus spoke in what he hoped, was a rather understanding tone. He noticed Harry sigh

"Professor, have you ever wondered, in all your years of being a spy, which side of the war was the right one?"

"Several times, Mr. Potter. Is that what is going on? You are unsure as to which side is the correct one to be on?" Harry could only nod his head.

"So the Gryffindor Golden Boy is considering the darker side of the war?" Snape smirked

"Please don't patronize me, sir. I'm not considering the 'dark' side, but I'm not sure I want to consider the 'light' side anymore, either."

"How so?" Snape asked puzzled. "Surely the death of your friend, at the hands of the enemy, would have only recemented the need of the presence of 'light' in the world."

"That's just it though, isn't it? Neither side is really pure. Both sides have fought for opposite ideals, yes. The Death Eaters are fighting for a pure-blood world, and the Order is fighting for the death of all evil. Both sides are fighting for, what they see as, a utopia. But underneath that, both sides are responsible for deception, greed, lies, even the deaths of innocents. Maybe there is no black and white as The Headmaster has led me to believe." Harry spoke using his hands to further his explanation.

"Are you suggesting that The Order of the Phoenix is just as guilty as murder as the Death Eaters?!"

"Yes, maybe less deaths. And maybe not everyone enjoys it like the Death Eaters do, but death is death, Professor. Right?"

"Why are you even thinking like this, Harry?" Harry looked up at the mention of his first name, wondering if Snape noticed the slip.

"My own reasons, but it is true. Isn't it Professor?"

"Harry, I'm not sure what I can say to you." Harry looked down at his feet, despite the holes that his professor was boring into his head. "What has made you think this? Perhaps if you tell me I can help you."

"People keep getting taken from me, killed. Two very important people to me died that day, professor."

"Harry, Mr. Diggory was the only student to die that day."

"Yes, he was the only student."

"Then, I don't get what you are talking about." Snape insisted.

"Cedrick was killed by the leader of the dark, Voldemort. But Professor Dumbledore, leader of the light, killed my lover. Both sides have played rather equal parts in my life, and neither side looks desirable. Can you see where I'm coming from now?" Harry's begging green eyes met with Snape's onyx ones.

Snape took a deep breath, wondering 'Was the boy begging him for me to understand or for me to keep his secret?'

"Harry, the only other person to die that day was-"

"Barty Crouch Jr. I know." Harry said cutting of his professor.

"Are you trying to tell me that Barty Crouch Jr., a well known Death Eater, was your lover?" Snape looked murderous.

"No. My lover was Barty Crouch Jr., _former_ Death Eater. He was spying for the Order, even though no one but me knew. I know you don't believe me, but you can ask Professor Dumbledore. Every other week, a note with red scrolled writing on it, flew through his window and landed on his desk. After some time, The Headmaster found the notes to be helpful and trustworthy. In fact, I believe that he came to depend on them." Harry's eyes stared intently into Snape's "Barty Crouch Jr. was a **kind** man, despite his past. I never believed that people could change until I met him. I found out his secret identity shortly after school started. He was one of two people who didn't shun me with the rest of the school. Cedrick and Barty were all I had. While every other student _and_ teacher was busy condemning me, Barty trained me to defeat the dragon, helped me defeat the Merpeople, and even went against Voldemort's wishes and exposed himself as spy when he made the TriWizard trophy a two-way port key, when Voldemort believed that Barty had made it a one-way port key. He risked everything, for **me**. No one but my parents has ever done that for me before, Professor. Yes, he was my lover, and I was his; and believe it or not, we were happy together. Happier than I have _ever_ been. He was supposed to survive, I was going to live with him over the summer to avoid going back to my abusive relatives. But Dumbledore condemned Barty, my love, an innocent man, with a fate worse than death. He let the Dementor's suck out his soul, and then the Headmaster killed his body."

"You can't expect me to believe this? He confessed his allegiances under Veritaserum, Potter!"Snape snapped.

"He confessed false allegiances!" Harry yelled standing up and banging his fists on the teacher's heavy wooden desk. "He trained himself to be immune to the effects of the potion. He told everyone that he was following Voldemort to save me!"Harry confessed as he sat back down. "He said that I could be thrown in Azkaban, and charged with aiding the crimes he committed while spying." Tears slid down Harry's cheeks at the memory of his lover's bravery and self-sacrifice. "He did it to save me from being discredited, or arrested, or even killed. He knew what he was in the past, Professor, but that was not what he was when Dumbledore killed him. He was no more tainted than me." Harry finished as he clenched his hands into fists, willing the tears to go away.

"That night in the Defense office, you were not crying over Diggory or the Dark Lord-"

"My lover was just given the death sentence. What would you have done?"

"Why didn't you tell us?" Snape asked out of curiosity.

"You would not have believed me, neither you, or the Wizarding World, or even the Wizengamot. He gave me a code word that he would have only used when necessary. He told me to-"

"Remember?" Snape asked memory being flooded with the speech he had one over and over in his mind.

Harry nodded "How did you know?"

"It was the only word of his testimony that didn't make sense, it seemed…out of place."

"Yes, he was telling me to remember a previous conversation we had. He knew what was coming, maybe not so soon, but he knew that he would have to save me one day."

"Well, I must say that I am surprised. If what you say is true, I can certainly understand where you change in views is coming from now. Perhaps I have questioned you sufficiently for one night. Go back to your dorm and get some rest." Severus stood and put his hand on Harry's arm to stand him up. Harry stood and walked towards the door, looking back as Snape watched him leave. "Should you ever need anyone to confide in, I can certainly understand what you are going through more than most."

"Thank You, Professor." Snape stopped Harry before he could leave.

"Potter, please believe that we did not know that Barty Crouch Jr., had changed so. Albus knew only of his crimes, not his innocence." Severus confessed

"You can never know everything, about those you plan to kill, Professor." Harry spoke as he walked out and gently closed the door.

Snape calmly walked to his desk and sat down. He picked up his ink well, and without any warning, hurled it across the room, putting his face in his hands. "You stupid boy, I may not have innocence, but I would give up everything up for you. Did you think I had been saving you all of these years for the sake of the Wizarding World? I could care less about everyone else-if it could just be you and me."

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Yea- there ya have it. This will be on pause for only about a week until I can finish finals. I just had to get this idea out of my head. I am open to suggestions as to where you would like me to take this. So give me an awesome review and/or awesome ideas.

Thanks for reading y'all.

Till next time. Blossoming Nightshade


	3. Is Everything Alright?

The next morning Harry woke to a nightmare, sweating and panting. He took the Invisibility cloak from his trunk and walked off to the library, carefully avoiding Filtch and that horrid cat of his, Mrs. Norris. He unlocked the door and walked to the back near the fire. He threw the powder into the flames calling out for his godfather who quickly appeared in the flames.

"Sirius, morning."

"Morning, Harry. It's bloody early pup, is everything okay?"

"No. can I come back and live with you? Everything here is so fucked up, all the feelings. You said that I could live with you if it got to be too much. Can I?" Harry held back the tears that threatened to overwhelm him.

"Harry, you've only been there a few weeks." Sirius admitted softly

"I know, but I just can't do it anymore."

"Pup, I know you can. When I James and Lilly died, I was devastated, but you have to move on normally and not let it destroy you. I know you can do this. Just give it one more month; I know it will get better."

How could Harry tell Sirius that this had nothing to do with Cedrick? That he missed his lover, the man who helped him survive last year. Sirius would never understand.

"But Sirius-"

"Please Pup? Just try. For me?" A gleam shimmered in his godfather's eye and Harry caved in.

"Two weeks. For you."

"Great!" Sirius gleamed his trademark smile. "Now go down to breakfast and eat a big stack of blueberry pancakes." Sirius laughed and disengaged the call.

Harry walked back to the dorm to find that many of the students had gotten ready and rushed down to breakfast. He put his cloak back into the truck as Neville and Ron talked downstairs, and walked into the showers. He turned on the water and cast a locking and silencing charm around the shower stall and sat down as the hot water hot him, crying loudly.

Harry walked into the Great Hall roughly 40 minutes later, with his head hanging down trying to avoid people seeing his puffy red eyes. He made his way to the Gryffindor table and sat between Ron and Hermione.

"Where ya been mate? We've been saving a seat for ya?"

"Sorry. I had an early morning firecall with Padfoot." Harry whispered making sure no one over head.

"Is everything okay?" Hermione asked

"Yea. Yea." Harry said as he reached over grabbing pancakes from a platter nearby "Just called to see how he's doing, you know." Harry lied as he concentrated on pouring the syrup over his pancakes; unaware of his friends sharing a questioning between each other behind his back.

"Harry?" The bushy-haired girl began

"Yea, 'Mione?"

""Is everything alright?"

"Yea, why wouldn't it be?" Harry asked taking a bite hoping that she would not delve further.

"Well, Ron noticed that you were reading when he went to sleep, and when he woke up in the middle of the night. He said that when he woke up, you were gone. Did you sleep at all?"

"Of course I did!"

"Oh yea" Hermione argued "How many hours."

"Seven" Harry stated.

"Harry James Potter don't lie to me." Hermione all but yelled

"Just under two hours, you happy now?"

"No, I'm not happy. Harry you hardly sleep anymore, you hardly eat, if you eat at all-"

"I eat!" Harry argued

"Yea? How many meals did you eat yesterday?"

"Three." Harry blurted out

"Wrong." Hermione answered "You missed dinner

"I snuck down to the kitchen last night."

"I don't believe you."

"Look 'Mione, my eating habits are fine." Harry said pinching the bridge of his nose

"Really?" Hermione yelled "Then I must have imagined the twenty or more pounds you've lost over the last several months. Harry you are wasting away."

"Look guys. I'm glad you are worrying about me. I really am. But everything is fine." Harry said shooting her a look hoping she would give up.

"Everything is not fine! Stop saying that!" Hermione yelled standing up as Draco walked up behind her with Crabb and Goyle flanking the blond prince. Little did the students know that they had gained the attention of the Potions Master at the head Table.

"What's wrong, Potter? Lose your teddy bear?" Draco said as he imitated crying, his goons laughing behind him.

"Shove off, Malfoy." Ron spat

"Why? Is Potter too upset?" Draco asked as Potter stood up walking towards the Slytherin.

"Leave, Malfoy" Harry warned as Malfoy closed the gap and leaned in close

"Want to know what I think, Potter? I think you are feeling guilty. Guilty for getting your friend killed. Ever notice how everyone around you dies. They drop like flies. Maybe you have, and that's what's getting to you." Malfoy leaned back and walked away from a wide-eyed Harry.

"He is such a prick. What did he say Harry?" Ron asked

"Nothing." Harry breathed out with a straight face.

"Alright." Hermione replied "Let's get to class, Transformation is in ten minutes."

"Go on without me guys. I'm going to try and get some sleep."

"And just what are we supposed to tell McGonagall?"

"Just tell her I'm sick." Harry sat back down as he heard Hermione sigh.

"Ok, mate" Ron said putting a hand on Harry's shoulder "Just take it easy, okay? Catch ya later." Ron yelled as Hermione pulled him from the hall.

Severus watched as Harry sat back down at his table, putting his face in his hands as the last of the students left the hall for classes. Severus also watched as Harry picked up his book bag and headed out of the Great Hall looking worse than when he had talked with him. The Potions Master walked past the Gryffindor table on his way out to class and noticed only one bite missing from the pancake that Harry put on his plate. He would be having another talk with him, soon.

Severus was hoping to hold Harry back after his Potions class, however, when the bell rung he noticed the absence of the boy. He continued on as usual, firecalling McGonagall after class.

"Minerva, was Mr. Potter in your class today?"

"No, Severus. Ms. Granger informed me that he was not feeling well, but Poppy has not seen him. I figure that he had simply gone to his room. Why do you ask?"

"No reason. Thank you Minerva."

"Of course, Severus."

Severus stepped from the fire and checked his watch. It was his free period. He needed a walk to think, sunlight always lightened his mood. Even if the students didn't think he got any sunlight at all. He looked out the windows in his private rooms after grabbing a sunscreen potion, and noticed a boy with a tuft of black hair standing near the Black Lake. If Severus had to guess, the boy would also have a lightening shaped scar just above his beautiful green eyes.

Severus hurried down towards the lake, trying as much as possible to make it look like he had simply stumbled upon Harry on his walk.

Harry stood at the edge of the Black Lake, feeling the wind in his hair, the soft droplets of water at his feet; but all he could feel otherwise was the utter despair of losing the one person who loved him. He held onto himself, his head falling foreword as he took a deep breath. He heard the step coming toward him, and looked backwards

"Professor Snape?"

"Hello, Mr. Potter."

"What are you doing out here?" Harry asked.

"Going for a walk. The outdoors always clears my head. What about you Mr. Potter? I noticed your absence from my classroom. Ms. Granger said that you were feeling ill?"

"Something like that." Harry said

"Perhaps you could elaborate?" Severus said looking at the man

"I feel lost. Around every corner, I'm looking for him, at every meal, in every DADA class, every walk though the castle at night. I can't get the fact that he is never coming back into my head. I feel like I'm lost, like I'm losing myself, more and more with everyday that passes. I'm falling further and further…" Harry paused taking a deep breath

"Mr. Potter, are you feeling alright?" Severus asked noticing how Harry was swaying on his feet, as he reached out a hand to the professor, looking for stability. Severus grasped the seeking hand then put his other hand on his students shoulder.

"Mr. Potter, what is wrong?" Harry stumbled side to side

"Lightheaded…so lightheaded." Harry replied as he fell towards his teacher.

"Harry?" Severus yelled as he caught the young man in his arms. "Harry!" the older Potions Master yelled shaking the unresponsive man in his arms.


	4. Strange Disease

"_Mr. Potter, what is wrong?" Harry stumbled side to side_

"_Lightheaded…so lightheaded." Harry replied as he fell towards his teacher._

"_Harry?" Severus yelled as he caught the young man in his arms. "Harry!" the older Potions Master yelled shaking the unresponsive man in his arms._

"Harry!" Severus yelled. "Hang on, I'm going to carry you up to Poppy" Severus said lifting the young man in his arms, thrown off a bit by just how light he was; surely a man of his height and age should not weigh so little? Severus ran across the grounds and up into the castle as fast as his long legs could carry him. He kicked open the door of the infirmary which elicited a yelp from the grey-haired Mediwitch.

"Severus, what's wrong?" she yelled, noticing the limp boy in his arms, head lolling back and forth with every step the potions professor took.

"Place him on the bed. Quickly." She said while running over to them both. The witch quickly cast a diagnostic spell and looked for any injuries. Finding none she cast another spell.

Severus focused his attention on Poppy as she cast a diagnostic spell. Her face quickly donned a face of frustration before casting a spell that Severus did not recognize, the result, he guessed, was the reason for her current frown.

"What's wrong, Poppy?" Severus asked as the Mediwitch looked up at her colleague.

"Perhaps, it would be best if I called Albus and Minerva down so that I could explain it to everyone." Of course this only worried Severus further. He sat in a chair near the bed and did his best to hide the mayhem of emotions deep beneath his mask. He heard the briefest background noises of several floo calls being made, but tried his best to ignore it. What happened if the boy was dying? Did the Dark Lord get to him somehow when Severus was not watching? Was it a spell? A curse? A poison? A potion? These thoughts swirled around his head, drowning his thoughts until Minerva and Albus rushed into the room.

"Poppy, what seems to be the problem?" Albus asked quickly getting to the point.

"Severus brought in Mr. Potter about ten minutes ago. He apparently collapsed, without any warning what-so-ever near the Black Lake. Fearing injury or infection, I preformed a quick but thorough diagnostic spell on him but found no injuries."

"What does this mean?" Minerva worriedly asked

"It means that there is nothing _purely_ physical wrong with him. I cast an emotional and mental evaluation spell afterwards, knowing that Mr. Potter is going through a rather rough period in his life, and have found the worst."

"You don't mean-"

"Yes, Albus. Young Harry here has advanced Malatempura." There were gasps heard from both Albus and Minerva, yet Severus was clueless as to what this all meant.

"What is it you say that he has? And what is it?" Severus asked

"Malatempura is a rare magical disease that affects only those in the deepest despair. It is similar to the muggle form of depression. Muggle depression leaves you vulnerable to feelings of loneliness, extreme melancholy, the inability or lack of desire to be around your friends or even do the things that were once enjoyed."

"We all know about this, Poppy." Severus cut in

"Yes, well unlike depression, Maletempura feeds off of a wizard or witch's magical core, slowly depleting it over the course of months or even years, until there is nothing magical left."

"But that means-" Severus began

"Yes, unless Mr. Potter is cured, he will become a squib."

"That's the most absurd thing I have ever heard!" Severus exclaimed then sighed. "What needs to be done to cure Potter?" Severus asked sounding his best to sound put-off.

"Well, just as the disease is caused by deep despair, the cure is a simple, yet difficult one. He needs to be in an uplifting and cheerful environment."

"Potter simply needs to be shown that the world is a happy place?" Severus said raising a skeptical eyebrow

"Yes, he needs to be handed to a guardian to whom he can open up and talk about whatever has caused him to come to this, and who can give him a constant shoulder to cry on, heal, and show him how to be happy. More often than not, these patients have lost not only the ability, but have forgotten simply _how_ to be happy."

"How very melodramatic." Severus drawled

"I'm afraid that it's a bit more complicated in Harry's case. He appears to rather malnourished. He is almost 30 pounds less than the minimum suggested weight for a boy his height and age. We have to get him back to a respectable weight before his magic will grow further."

"It seems that the Weasley's would be the best choice. Between Molly's cooking and Arthur's devotion to Harry's happiness, we will have him back to his healthy self in almost no time at all. Right, Poppy?" Minerva asked hoping that it would solve everything

"Yes and no. He will be healthier from a physical standpoint, but unless the guardian teaches him to pursue happiness in a currently familiar setting, one that he considers to be normal everyday life, such as school, he will not be able to adapt his lessons and cure to solve the problem. He will simply see it as a vacation and deteriorate when he returns back."

"Then who do you suggest?" Albus asked before a silence surrounded the room as Poppy carefully thought about her options.

"Actually, it's a bit unorthodox, but perhaps…Severus would be the best bet. He could stay in a guest room in Severus's quarters." Poppy admitted

"Me?" Severus shouted "Why me? Why not Lupin or even Black?"

"It is actually a more desirable situation than Harry staying with someone that he views as a parental figure. Unlike the others, he will have the ability to learn how to be happy again without the pressure of approval from the guardian. He may not like you Severus, but he does respect you. I believe that combination will prove most beneficial for Harry. If it does not work than we can figure out another alternative, but I do honestly believe that this is the option most beneficial to Harry at this time." Poppy finished and the occupants all stared at Albus.

"I will set up a guest room in Severus chambers." Albus said with finality.

"Albus, you can't expect me to shelter a teenage boy in my quarters, much less Harry Potter!"

"I believe that I can expect it, Severus." The old man spoke tilting his head to look over the top of his half-moon spectacles. "I believe that you have both the ability to understand young Harry, and a slight bit more knowledge as to what is causing this."

"Headmaster!" Severus shouted

"I will be down later this evening to add a room to your part of the dungeons. I suggest that you perhaps construct a more bright and friendly environment for Harry." Albus said before Snape let out a resigned sigh.

'True, I like Harry, and I know more about his situation than anyone else, but I don't think that automatically entitles him to live with me. I am rather fond of my privacy' Snape thought walking out of the infirmary and closing the door.

"Do you really think that this is wise, Albus? After everything that Severus has been through, do you really think that we should be putting both Harry's happiness _and_ recovery in his hands?" Minerva asked wondering Albus' train of thought in this particular case.

"On the contrary, Minerva; after everything that Severus has been through, I think that he may be the _only_ one able to give Harry his happiness back. Besides, I think that it's about time that they both could use a bit of cheerfulness in their lives."


	5. Past Sins Forgiven

Severus sat in a rather comfortable chair beside Harry's bed in the infirmary, wondering how everything would turn out. Severus had redecorated his entire quarters, well, except his room. He had added touches of color to the living room, and some whimsical decorations in the kitchens, hoping that he had made it at least a bit more tolerable for a younger lodger. He knew that random potions vials and dark colors were probably not the best for Harry's recovery. After the initial shock of realizing that the man he secretly harbored feelings for was going to live with him, well, he grew slightly more excited about the entire prospect. Severus perhaps hoped that in the slim, astronomically slim that is, chance that this "cure" actually worked, and that he could help Harry find happiness again, maybe they could become more. Maybe Harry could find happiness in him as well. Severus internally laughed, no, fairy-tale endings were not meant for men like him.

Severus was brought out of his thoughts by several people entering the infirmary. Remus led the group followed by a rather distraught looking Sirius, both of the Weasley parents following suit.

"How is he doing Severus? Has he woken at all?" Remus asked as the members of the Order surrounded his bed.

"No. He was given several sleeping potions this morning to help him rest and regain some energy. He should awake anytime within the next few hours. How did everyone find out?" Severus said never taking his eyes off the boy.

"Albus informed all of us last night. He told us what happened and what needs to happen for Harry to recover." Remus said

"Snape, do you really believe that he will recover?" Sirius asked. Severus noted just how tired the man looked, wondering how much worry had to be plaguing him for this usually lively man to act in such a fashion.

"I believe that the possibility exists. I will certainly try my hardest, but the boy has obstacles to overcome that none of us could have imagined. The true recovery lies upon his shoulders, it is his decision." At these words Molly covered her mouth with a handkerchief to try and keep from crying aloud, and Severus noticed how Sirius let his head hang low.

"Perhaps, Black-" Severus began as he stood up to his full height "You would join me in my chambers for a moment? Simply to ensure that Harry will approve of the changes I have made for his convenience." Sirius nodded his head and followed Severus through the floo, neither man noticing the stunned looks of Molly, Arthur, and Remus.

Both men stepped into Snape's living room.

"Black, I am aware that your worry is for Harry, and far be it from me to care, but there is something else that is bothering you. If it has to do with Harry, I need to know." Severus said handing the man a short glass of Firewhiskey.

"Yesterday, early morning, he asked me if he could come back and stay with me. I told him that if things got too difficult that he could take some time off and stay at Grimmuald Place with me, but he asked me and I told him no. He begged and I…I asked him to give it some more time…now he's collapsed. I wanted to bring him back, I really did but I just thought that he would be able to handle his friend's death if he had all of his other friends around him constantly. I feel like this is my fault, maybe if I had let him return, then none of this would have happened."

"Black. As much as I enjoy seeing you wallow in your misery, this existed long before yesterday morning. This has been going on since, at the very least, the beginning of the school year, and probably much longer. This is not something that can appear overnight." Severus admitted before taking a large sip of Firewhiskey, enjoying the feeling of the burning sensation down his throat.

"You know what's causing this, don't you Snape?"

"I know a large part of it. It's something Harry feels that he has to hide, perhaps rightfully so. But perhaps he will open up to you soon. You just have to show him that you won't judge him, the way I'm sure the others will."

"I'll do anything. I just want Harry to get better, no matter what it takes." Sirius admitted downing the glass in one go.

'As do I,' Severus thought sipping at his drink, 'As do I.'

"Let's return to the hospital ward, I want to be there when Harry wakes up." Sirius insisted

"Very well, though you may want to dismiss Remus, Molly and Arthur. Harry needs rest, not a welcoming party."

"Yes." Sirius took the advice to heart knowing that Severus was right; the last thing Harry would want is to be crowded over being bombarded with questions. As loathe as he was to admit it, a part of him truly believed that Snape could help heal his godson.

Severus and Sirius sat on either side of Harry in an uncomfortable silence for an hour and a half before Harry began to stir.

"urrrg" Harry moaned as he tried to sit up, his efforts quickly thwarted by a large hand on his chest pushing him back down.

"Stay down, conserve your energy." A silky voice spoke

"Harry? I'm so glad you're awake" spoke a gruff voice

"mmm…Sirius? What's going on?"  
"You're in the infirmary at Hogwarts. You collapsed." Sirius quickly filled in

Harry felt a glass vial being shoved into his hand with a stern "Drink this; it is a Pepper-up potion. It will give you an energy boost. You've been asleep for over 12 hours now and we have some things to explain to you."

"Professor Snape?" Harry asked rubbing the sleep from his eyes

"Yes. Now drink." Severus spoke as Harry uncorked the vial and downed it in one gulp.

"Gaaa, you really need to figure out a way to make these things taste better, Professor." Harry cringed

"Yes, well if they all tasted like lollipops and gumdrops, I fear those clumsy enough to injure themselves would be more inclined to do so." Severus admitted making Harry think that perhaps Severus had actually thought about making them taste better, Harry giggled, though almost unnoticeably.

"Harry, do you remember what happened?" Sirius asked covering his godsons hand with his own large one.

"I was standing by the Black Lake, when Professor Snape came by to talk to me. I started to feel really lightheaded…that's the last I remember." Harry said rather puzzled.

"Harry, you collapsed. Snape had to carry you here to be treated by Madam Pomfrey. He couldn't wake you up." Sirius said, the grim look on his face unfitting.

"Oh, well I was really tired earlier. I probably just fell asleep."

"I'm afraid not, Mr. Potter. It has been brought to our attention that you are ill. Very ill. You have a rare magical disease called Malatempura. It's similar to depression, but it is a more severe form that feeds off of your magical core. Unless it is treated, you could be rendered a squib for the rest of your life." Severus explained hoping that the explanation was suitable.

"Wait, you mean just because I'm a bit depressed, all of my magic could be sucked out of me?"

"In not so simple terms, yes. That is what that means." Severus spoke crossing his arms over his chest noticing Harry's gaping mouth

"That is the most ridiculous…preposterous thing I've ever heard! And I went up against a three-headed dog!" Harry said emphasized by his arms being thrown up into the air.

"I'm sorry, Harry, but Snape is right." Sirius admitted gripping his hand tighter over his godson's.

"So, what happens now? Do you have to brew some sort of potion or cast a spell or something?" Harry wondered as both men looked at each other.

"Actually Harry, the only way to cure it is to be happy." Sirius said, knowing that he made it sound more simple than it really was.

Poppy emerged from another room.

"Mr. Potter, hello. How are you feeling?"

"A bit shaken."

"Yes that can happen. I'm assuming that Mr. Black and Severus explained what has happened?"

"Yes, but I'm still a bit confused."

"That's alright. I have taken the liberty of putting together a pamphlet for you to answer any questions you may have, and I will be explaining it in far more detail than, I'm sure, Mr. Black and Professor Snape were able to provide. You will spend the rest of the day here before going to your new room, so I am sure that we will have plenty of time to talk about both the conditions of the disease and the steps to recovery." The Mediwitch spoke

"Ok…wait…my new room?" Harry asked

"Yes, you will be staying in a guest room in Severus' chambers" Madam Pomfrey spoke as Harry looked wide-eyed at the potion's master.

"Oh. Can't I stay in my dorm?" Harry asked

"I'm afraid not, Mr. Potter. You need to be under the care of the assigned guardian at all times, when not in class. I will explain the reasons later on when we talk about everything in more detail. Is this going to be a problem for you?" The grey-haired witch asked him.

Harry sat in silence wondering; will this be a problem? I have to live with the greasy git, but I guess he was nice enough to take me in, and he doesn't seem to be mad about it right now. Maybe this will be okay. Besides, he knows all my secrets, so I guess, if I _had_ to talk to someone, he would be the best choice. It could be worse I suppose- I could have had to stay with the Weasley's. Harry remembered the last time that he got a simple cold, the way the entire family went around waiting on him hand and foot, asking if he was feeling alright the entire day, while Mrs. Weasley made him about forty different soups, it drove him crazy. He shivered at the notion of having to stay with them again, and then giggled a bit at how funny it had been.

"No, Madam Pomfrey. There won't be a problem." Harry said looking at her.

"Good. I'm going to give you some alone time with Mr. Black and Professor Snape. I will be back out shortly after I get a few things straightened out." The mediwitch turned and went in to her office.

Harry look at Sirius.

"What were you just thinking about that made you giggle pup?"

"Oh, last year I got a tiny cold. The Weasley's were running around me fretting the whole time, Mrs. Weasley must have cooked like, forty or fifty different soups. And I was only sick for a few days. I'm just grateful that I'm not staying with them, I suppose. I mean, I love them a lot, but they can drive you crazy." Harry admitted noticing the smiles on Sirius and Snape's faces.

"That sounds like Molly." Sirius said ruffling his godson's hair.

"Indeed, that does sound like the Weasley's. For now, Harry, you may have some alone time with your Godfather. I will be back around six to pick you up. I will then escort you to your rooms and introduce you to my chambers. After that we will have a quiet dinner in my dining room away from the noise of the Great Hall. I will see you at six." Severus said before walking towards the fireplace and flooing to his quarters.

"Ummm…why isn't Snape upset with me?" Harry asked Sirius.

"Well, I think he understand your situation more than the rest of us. He said that he knows what is going on. As much as I hate to admit it- he is really trying. He didn't even call me 'Mutt'. Sirius laughed before noticing Harry look down.

"What's wrong?"

"He told you didn't he? He told you what happened." Harry asked

"Harry, he didn't tell me anything. He said that it was for you to tell, and I agree. Even if I do want to know what's caused this-I can wait for you to talk to me." Sirius noticed Harry sigh in relief. "Harry, you do know that you can talk to me right. I went through a rough patch when your Mum and Dad died. And if it's something more than that…well- I may not understand, but I won't judge you. There's very little you could do to make me ashamed of you." Sirius said putting his hand on Harry's to comfort him.

"Very little?" Harry wondered

"Well, short of joining You-Know-Who, there's nothing. And I'm not really worried about that, so yea, there's nothing you could do that would make me ashamed of you. And I will always love you. You're my pup, and I just want to see you happy, alright?" Sirius asked and smiled as Harry nodded.

"I'm just not ready to talk about it yet."

"Whenever you're ready, I'll be here. So will Remus, if you want him to be. He would never be ashamed of anything you do either. You know that right?" Sirius asked.

"I do now. Thanks Sirius." Harry hugged his godfather tight, not letting go, and after several hours of talk Harry fell into a deep sleep until Madam Pomfrey woke him.

"Mr. Potter, I believe that we have things to discuss."


End file.
